Thursday, September 5, 2013

The Woes of Being Tall

People don’t understand how hard it is to be tall. Everyone just assumes that because someone is tall that makes life so much easier. Well it doesn't. There is much more than meets the eye when it comes to the life of someone who is tall.
                First of all, everyone and their brother want to go up and tell you that you’re tall. As if I didn't notice. It’s not like they pointed out something that I never noticed before. I didn't just notice that I was tall. I didn't notice when I got out of bed or had to cram into a small car or when I was standing in line looking over everyone’s heads, or even when the person in front of me asked the exact same question as you. Like come on give me a little credit on my part. Do they think that all tall people are dumb or something!? I can assure anyone who was wondering that tall people are not dumb.
                Then anyone who talks to me asks if I play basketball because I am so tall. My reply is always, “Do you play mini golf because you’re short?” After I reply with that they take offence to it! They must think that it’s ok for them to say someone is tall just because it is supposedly good. Well I guess they don’t take into account all the problems that come with it. I mean everyone assumes that because someone is tall life is better because they don’t have to ask for help reaching for things. On that point I would just like to say that I will not grab anything from the top shelf for you, grab a chair and stop being so lazy.
                The most obvious problem that tall people have is when we walk through doorways, get on bus’s, ride on airplanes, or even try sleeping on the tiny twin bed that the university gives everyone. It is like people are so in awe of tall people they just forget to accommodate us.  We are the most and the least noticed! People like to tell us we are tall and admire us but as soon as it comes to creating something new every one forgets we exist and makes whatever it is a few sizes too small.  It is so much easier for a short person to adjust to bigger things than it is for taller people to adjust to shorter things. Take being in an airplane for instance. If there were more room in between rows it wouldn't affect a short person much at all. Not only that but us tall people would be much more comfortable and would have no complaints.
                Another problem us tall people face is finding clothes that fit. It is like everyone just assumes that tall people have wide hips. Well they are just not right. There are plenty of us who don’t have wide hips and we can never find jeans that fit! Us tall small hipped guys have nowhere really to buy jeans. The only company that has jeans that can fit without being custom made is Levi and even then there are only a few options. And to top it all off people give us grief about wearing shorts all the time and never dressing “nice.” The other difficult part about being tall is trying to find shirts that fit. The sleeves are hardly ever long enough or the shirt is too baggy or too short.  How am I supposed to even shop for clothes anymore? Things are just so ridiculous.
                Obviously home contractors have a thing against tall people. For one I have never met a contractor who was above six foot. Clearly these people are jealous of the gift of being tall. Because of this they must feel the need to make life difficult for tall people in houses. The doorways are hardly ever tall enough and even if I don’t hit my head on the door it will most certainly mess up my hair. How is this even legal? We have laws for handicapped people and accommodating them, why isn't the same done for tall people? Busses should have more leg room, same with airplanes. Drinking fountains should be taller. It is always so uncomfortable having to stick my butt in people’s faces when getting a drink of water. There is just nothing right about any part of that situation.
                One situation people probably don’t think about is all the aches and pains that come along with being tall. Everything is always sore. Backs, knees, feet, shoulder you name it and it is usually sore. Now people will say “well everyone has problems like those especially if you’re an athlete.” To that I say there is no possible way that everything that I have that’s sore came from athletics. I get the back and shoulders but random pains in the middle of the night? Yeah no there is no way that those happen to short people. They are called growing pains for a reason.
                Now finally there is the argument that girls love tall guys while this is pretty much a scientific fact, imagine how a tall girl must feel. Most guys even if they are tall will go for shorter girls it’s nothing personal just the general taste as a whole. So the struggle of a tall girl being able to find a boyfriend is real. The problem with being a tall guy when dating someone is there is absolutely no way to impress a girl with your dancing skills because I have never met a tall guy who is an amazing dancer. That can be a problem when trying to impress someone albeit a small one.

                So now that I am done ranting you all know the tall people struggle. It is not all glamorous as many would have you believe. It is a hard, repetitive and painful life to live for which there is no sympathy from anyone. Whether it be pain, ridicule, repetitive questions, prejudice or a social life being tall has many problems that people don’t know or understand.

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